Author Kuukua Yomekpe #52essays, bipolar, DEPRESSION, doctors, doctors, grief, journey, Love, medication, Mental Dis-Ease

No One Can Hold All This Darkness

No one can support all the grief I hold. I've known that for a while now. Sometimes it makes me whisper: I can’t do this anymore. The funny thing is that I could have been laughing and chatting up a storm with different people over the course of an evening and then boom I end … Continue reading No One Can Hold All This Darkness

Author Kuukua Yomekpe #52essays, doctors, doctors, faith, grief, journey, medication, Mental Dis-Ease, reflections

I DON’T GOT THIS!

I've been diagnosed with a debilitating disease that is progressive and chronic and has no cure as of yet. I am in Week 2 of when the symptoms first appeared although at this point after going through my medical history, other symptoms have been manifesting all along; this was just a defining one. I posted … Continue reading I DON’T GOT THIS!

Author Kuukua Yomekpe bipolar, Love, medication, Mental Dis-Ease, reflections

Not Where I’m Supposed to Be: Depression and Turning 38

I don't get sick often. A week ago I was in the hospital for four days.  And this wasn't like getting sick with the flu or something. I had severe kidney distress. This was not particularly new because I've always had kidney stones. Since I was 16, really. What was new with this trip was … Continue reading Not Where I’m Supposed to Be: Depression and Turning 38

Author Kuukua Yomekpe bipolar, medication, reflections

Summer Plans Anyone?

My summer has officially begun! I know it's technically 3 more weeks before the official proclamation but mine has begun. I'm perched carefully on a makeshift bean-bag on my small porch. I've got Hezekiah Walker and CeCe Winans and Yolanda Adams praising in the background. I've decided to write something everyday for my summer beginning today, the … Continue reading Summer Plans Anyone?

Author Kuukua Yomekpe bipolar, doctors, doctors, medication, Mental Dis-Ease, reflections

Leaving the Seclusion Room: A Journey to the Far Side of Sanity and Back Again

May is National Mental Health Awareness Month y’all. Help stop the stigma!

Kathryn M. McCullough

I will forever associate spring with an up-close-and-personal encounter with crazy, with losing my mind in an over-the-top kind of way.   And, indeed, my March Madness of 1990 ended life as I knew it.

Spring brings many forms of madness. Spring brings many forms of madness.

A university writing instructor, I was suffering through what should have been a relaxing spring break, when I began to crumble. In Oklahoma the branches were barely budding, when I started obsessing over trees and their ability to lead me elsewhere, wherever there was. I imagined it was a dimension parallel to the world around me.

A parallel place-- A parallel place–

I wanted desperately to go there, and it was that longing that ached me into action. It muscled me forward, compelling me to bring bare branches indoors and decorate my walls with them. (I kid you not.)  It seemed I was suddenly and acutely aware, as the sculptural quality of those limbs stunned and…

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